DES!

Can someone please explain to me the whole ‘b’ in front of laughter on the Interwebs.

Example: Bahahaha….

I don’t get it.

What I hear in my head when I read it sounds like someone possibly throwing up.

The 2012 resolutions (in no particular order):

Go back to Bikram Yoga (though I may have to trade my “services” to afford it)

Find a new home that I actually love (this is a mid year one)

Make my Etsy store awesome therefore making it profitable…

Eat better, go to the farmer’s market weekly for produce and stop buying EVERYTHING at the chain stores…

Continue being awesome.

Take challenges in stride.

Learn more.

Read.

Love.

Surround myself with wonderful (read: funny) people.

Take a trip…or three.

That is all. Let’s see what I keep up with…

So, now I have Blue Cross/Blue Shield as an insurance carrier and that’s awesome, the shit at Target was awful. Anyway, they sent me this card that told me if I did a bunch of random stuff that they would pay for, they would send me Visa cards full of free monies! DONE!

So, I took a health screening. Well, really, some people took some blood and weighed me and then I got this list telling me how likely I am to die and of what.

Turns out, though this is genetic, my cholesterol is RIDIC! like 341, ridiculous. WOW. Also, I’m fat, BMI of 26.4. What the hell? Last year I was 20 pounds lighter! Why is it that when you get a job and stop having to stop having to work every weekend, you get fat? WHAT’S WRONG WITH THAT PICTURE?!?!?

Alright, enough bitching, time to fix it. I am now on a mission to get healthier! I am going to start by giving up some things that are bad for me and gradually get into a good routine/diet. I will probably eventually go vegetarian (I will never give up my Feta!) because it will help the cholesterol bit. If anyone would live to give me encouragement, feel free!

I’ll probably update this with progress, not so much for you guys to read because you probably won’t care, but more of a way to help me keep track.

First things first, no more booze or soda!

Days without booze: 12 (as of 11/17/11)

Days without soda: 3 (as of 11/17/11) Monday was a rough day.

Also, I have not eaten any meat today. Win.

and…..GO!

I wish that I could convey my personality and intentions in text. I mean COMPLETELY convey. I want people to understand when I am sarcastic and when I mean just exactly what I am saying.

People should not read into things, they should just properly read them, maybe twice…..maybe three times.

Don’t make me feel bad because my entire apartment has self destructed in the past month and you THINK I am hinting that I want to move out. I DO want to move out, I want to run far away from this place with rent that is too high for me to have to stay home from work and deal with the issues. While I re-read all emails and I do not believe that I sounded like I wanted to move, maybe you read into your guilt that I am dealing with a pile of shit.

That is all.

If you can’t update your Apple products on your own, do us all a favor and throw them out a window. You don’t deserve them.

I have determined that I cannot bitch about things/people anywhere on the Interwebs but…HERE. Prepare to feel my annoyance!

Last night I ventured to St. A with a group of friends that live in Jax.

Bit-o-background. These friends are people I have known since I was 7 OR in middle school. They have all been very close with each other for years, including one pair of sisters, and I was left out of that group when I moved away bc of the divorce. They went to college together and all they like to do for fun is get drunk and crazy.

We went on a ghost pub tour. Fun, I know, but also I KNOW all of the stories. So I was a bit chatty with other people in the bars and tended to stay behind….I ended up looking for them at Meehan’s at the end of the night, said they were there, went up and down the stairs, twice. I didn’t find them but I did trip on the damn sidewalk in my damn heels to make me look like a douche AND scrape my knee and ankle (how does the ankle get involved?)

All in all, I was so annoyed, I went back to the van (they rented one to take the gang) and sat on the ground waiting for them. I slept the whole way home and drove home pissed.

I do not want this to be my life anymore, why did I even try to hang out with them. It’s almost worth it to not have friends in this town yet because the ones I know are not on my page. I’m giving up on being close to people that I knew when I was 7, it’s been a long 20 years and we have little to nothing in common.

Tax exempt weekend DOES apply to thrift stores. I am on the hunt for some cool kitchy mirrors and I wanted to punch the 5 people that either walked directly into me OR hit me with their carts (then touched me in apology, gross!)

As an additional lesson, I learned I really don’t enjoy other people when they are shopping, as if I didn’t already know this. I actually had to stop walking because people walked directly into me. This is ridiculous behavior! Why on Earth do you think that it is okay to completely ignore people?

Target aggravation of the week, the girl that rang me up tried to scan a coupon for about 2 minutes until I told her a better way to do it. The person behind me, in her oh-so-humorous moment, said, “You’re hired!” Bad joke.

Now the sky is falling. Holy rainstorm! I wish I could start this whole day over again.